i guess it is all my fault...
i admit i am in the wrong for not informing wei xuan i didn't send him the proposal..
but i didn't know i am bossy during the pioneering...
i know yan zhi got much more experience than me but he also never say that he can change my plan into a better one...if i was bossy i won even let u guys go buy drinks.
my parents hate me going to scouts...i trying my best be a good aspl while arguing with my parents everyday.all u guys know was to blame me for this and that.i am trying very hard to change without any support from u guys...why not try doing wat i am doing now?...
when i say my prob out,u didn't solve mine but others...u say u dun understand what i am toking about..did u even try to understand???i am so tired...i dun want to do anythings liao
you guys enjoyed shooting me anyway...yesterday plc...yes...i am angry...with Felicia..yes... when i stress up i cant do anything..yes...i was wrong from the start...yes..i am too bossy...yes...in the whole plc..i am the worse...yes..i deserves no respect...i am sorry guys...i m not a good leader...not a good aspl....sorry that i am not to your standard as a aspl...sorry guys
i got no defences...i really dun know who to turn to..i need a solution to this..i cant continue like this...i will need to learn....learn how to swallow all this...my heart is so pain when u guys were saying about me...from that moment onwards i feel that everything i have done for scouts just vanished..do u know how i feel when u all say that.all together?.
i cant concentrate in class anymore n final year exam is coming...what have i done...why...why..why is it always like that..i just cant continue anymore..i m trying so hard to keep myself in scouts...YET this is all i get...is this fate?is this my fate?
my parents keep nagging..asking why am i always so busy in scouts? why must i be the one going everyday? i am not going tmr..i feel so stress now...
i feel like watching the sun set and sun rise...n slowly forget everything...but i know i still need to return into that environment...for the first time in my life..i am going to say scouts is hell to me now...i hate the way it is now..i hate it!!!...
i m so confuse...
i just cant think positively anymore...
what is happening...
to me...
